Day 92

December 7, 2009

Happy Birthday to my great grandma, Gracie! I am exhausted. I hit the snooze for an hour this morning! I am fighting my eyelids all day long, sitting at my computer! Work is fun today, though! I get to watch the editor's pick what items they want for upcoming stories. They're going to be really fun! Everyone should subscribe to Better Homes & Garden and at www.bhg.com. I'm a member and let me yell ya'...the recipes that are e-mailed to you. Whew! Forget about it! They look amazing! Plus, all of the helpful fashion, beauty, and home decor tips. It's a fun website!

I actually have a plan to go get an exercise DVD after work. Yea...didn't happen. I will, eventually. I'm thinking Tae Bo. I know it's old school, but it's one heck of a workout! Test it out. You'll be either thanking me or hating me the next day because your butt cheeks haven't quit twitching from all of the leg exercises!

Winter is here people! I don't like it one bit. However, we don't have snow, just yet. All you Iowans need to keep it to yourselves. For once in your life, don't share! Don't be your Midwestern, hospitable selves. We don't want it! My friend Renee sends me a picture today via e-mail. It's pretty, but no fun to walk around in.

I get home from work to a lovely box of Christmas decorations from my Aunt Tammy. It's great! I didn't think I would have any this year, but I do and I'm loving them! We talk for an hour and a half and have one hell of a heart to heart! We talk about life, love, and the pursuit of happiness. It's a nice conversation two single woman can have together on a Monday evening! I love it! Tammy tells me of this new coffee shop kind of over by Drake's campus. I don't know what it's called, but she loves coffee more than I do, so I think we're going to go when I'm back!

If you aren't on Pandora.com, you should be a member! I always create new music stations and rock out all the time. Since I have yet to put up curtains, my neighbors probably think I'm nuts! There goes the crazy naked girl dancing around her apartment again at ten o'clock at night, is what I'm sure they are saying! Okay...I don't really dance around naked. I'm sure they've seen me naked plenty of times, but whatever. I sometimes like to air dry after I shower. I hate putting on clothes when my body is damp! No worries--it's nothing they haven't seen before. I told my mom tonight I should leave a tip jar on my balcony. It would make for good rent money! She has to be so proud of her only daughter! ;) And now dad knows where all his money went for dance lessons all of those years! Thanks dad! You're the best!

Right now, I have a little Trans Siberian Orchestra Christmas mix going on with my Pandora! I would love to see them in person. I have heard it's unbelievable! You know what I miss? Delilah and Lite 104.1 Christmas station. Delilah always solves the world's problems with the swift stroke of a finger. I'm not saying I have problems right now, (even though Lord knows I probably do;) ), I enjoy hearing the stories.

Dieting sucks! You think you're eating so healthy--a turkey sandwich and banana for dinner, and an apple and a turkey salad for lunch. Okay, and a Special K breakfast bar. Just that...800 calories! Are you kidding me?? What happens if you're still hungry and your stomach hurts? I guess just suck it up? Why can't everyone be fat or skinny? Life would be so much easier!

Please keep the Bosley family in your prayers this evening for a sad loss in their family. Grandpa was a great man and the cutest little guy I've ever seen! They should be proud to call him family--and they most definitely are!

I told myself I'm going to be in bed by ten and guess what? It's actually going to happen! Oh yes! I am going to be one of those lame-o's who is in bed early! I'm okay with that. I need my beauty rest!

I want to give you a quick update on the hottie firefighter by my work. I bet you just got really excited for me. Well...nothing has happened. I'm thinking the same thing...darn it! I haven't seen him since I last told you about the magical moment we locked eyes and he says, "Hey, how's it goin'?" (Sigh). I spoke too soon!

Note to self: Don't drink and drive. It's so stupid! I heard about the two kids getting killed in a drunk driving accident back home. It's completely unnecessary. Driving 115 mph? Really? Even sober, that's just beyond stupid! People don't understand what it does to families. Even though you're shaking your head right now, you have no idea. I don't either. After working at a funeral home and seeing the repercussions of a totaled car and what it does to your body, then having to watch these families look at their loved one like that? No way. It's traumatizing, maddening, and disappointing. How hard is it to pick up the phone and call to get a ride? So, you don't want to get in trouble? Well...now you're dead. I'd rather be grounded for a month and have my life. Don't let fear get in the way of living.

Day 91

December 6, 2009

Happy birthday to Jennifer--my bro's ex-girlfriend! She's still family to us! I cannot believe my brother and his friends are turning 21 years old! I remember when they were twelve years old and irritating as hell! All they were interested in was bothering my friends and I because they thought my friends were hott. Now, they're all really cool and fun to go out with! Too bad my designated drivers are diminishing one by one! Haha, just kidding! I never did that! ;)

So, today. I'm not going to lie. Overall, isn't a great day. Shopping is depressing because I want a Kate Spade handbag, that's on sale, and can't have it. I know what you're thinking...what a spoiled brat! Trust me...I'm thinking the same exact thing! I'm not used to not getting what I want. I am such a spoiled brat, and I throw a tantrum on the phone when I know I can't get it. Again...I know. I just dropped my mouth re-reading this, while shaking my head, realizing how ridiculous I am right now! I'm actually quite embarrassed with myself!

Ugh! I hate weighing my options between a material object and having money for when a friend comes in town. I would much rather have fun with my friend! I know I should be grateful, because having a great friend from home here is way better than a stupid handbag. But considering, I've never had to do this...I don't like it one bit! Welcome to the real world, Ashley! All I keep thinking is...wait until I have kids. Yikes! Then, I really won't get anything I want. Boo to babies, when it comes to that! =)

THEN...I came to the realization that I'm a heffer! Yes, a heffer! Since the summer, I went from a size four, to a size six. Gross! I miss my size four jeans. It's actually really difficult for me to write about this, but whatever. I talk to my mom and grandma, and they tell me my face has gotten, and I quote, "chubby." Ugh! I'm pretty sure my self-confidence went from about an 8 to about a -2. I don't want to be "chubby."  Whatever. I do realize that last year, I was a tad on the thin side, due to some high and unneeded stress in my life, but I was happy with my weight. Not so happy with my life, like I am now, but I liked my size four booty! So...I'm bound and determined to get back to that way!

On a lighter note! I get to see the Rockefeller Christmas tree tonight! It's amazingly beautiful! The lights are so bright, and sparkle so pretty in the night sky! Especially the Swarovski crystal star! They have an up-close version you can look at. Amazing is all I can say! Phil says he used his bedazzler at home to make it! Haha! Impressive. I take Phil on a hunt around the city to find the spectacular lights and windows the city has to offer. He's really excited about it! I can see it in his eyes! Ha! Yea right! He secretly enjoyed it! =)

 

We don't get very far...it's way too cold to wander around a city, where you have no idea where you're going! We travel to Rockefeller Center and on the way, we come across Saks Fifth Avenue. The windows are great, but the best part are the HUGE snowflakes that adorn the whole side of the large building. They flash to the beats and booms to the "Carol of the Bells," Christmas song. Check it out by the Trans Siberian Orchestra! Just click ahead to 40 seconds...that's when it starts getting good! It's a cool light show Saks puts on!

Okay, so I have a funny story, that only some may understand. Mind you...this is the first time Phil and I have been out together just the two of us. A couple from Washington state ask me if I can take their picture in front of the tree. I say sure. So, they hand me their camera and I say, "Okay, one second. Let me just get the tip in a little bit." I'm instantly embarrassed. All I can think of saying is the classic phrase, "That's what she said." Lol! Of course that would come out of my mouth right then, right?

While searching for Carol of the Bells, I stumble across my all-time favorite Christmas song, that translates into a wedding march! "Christmas Canon," also known as "Canon D." It's so pretty and one day (when I do decide to settle down and get married), this is what I'll be marching down to. Hopefully to a live orchestra (focusing on violins, of course!) Yeah, I already told dad to start saving now! Hehe! I get chills every time I hear it. Listen to it here! So, since I'm feeling sorry for myself today, what better way to make your self-esteem go way up, then listen to this song...single...and home alone. =) Lol! It really is beautiful! It gets me excited to come and spend time with family and friends! Can't wait to see everyone!

Note to self: When you ask someone for advice, be 100 percent prepared for their answer! If you're not ready to hear the truth, please, DON'T ASK! Your family is the most brutally honest people in the world...they're not afraid to hurt your feelings. Nor should they be. So when you ask if they can tell you've gained a bit of weight...expect to know what they're going to say. You already know the answer. Why do you need someone to confirm it? Sure...you probably look healthier than last year, but it still really pisses you off to the point where you want to scream. So, buck up, jump on the treadmill, and trim it off!