April 14, 2010
So, I'm still trying to figure my way around this beautiful city. However, I will tell you, I'm getting really tired of getting lost. I'm over it! After work, my mom and I went shopping for my bestie's bachelorette party! Can I just tell you, I bought her the perfect gift! I don't want to pat myself on the back, but I am a pretty good gift giver. I would tell you what I got her, but she reads this. So, Maddie...you're going to love it!
Oh my gosh! I didn't know The Jersey Shore cast is living in Miami now! This is what happens when you don't have cable in New York. You miss out on the ridiculous things in life. I told my mom, I want to see "The Situation" out and about. Can you even imagine? It would be hilarious to have a conversation with him. Excuse me kid, your "situation" is grossing me out. He's the type of guy that you would be able to make fun of him to his face, and he would have absolutely no idea you were doing it. I would have a hey-dey with him!
We went to Lucille's Bad to the Bone BBQ tonight. I'm not lying, but it was the best BBQ pork sandwich I've ever had. The restaurant is so cute! It's a down home, brick on the wall, wooden pillars on the ceilings, John Deere tin signs on the wall. For those living in Boca, I suggest you go! It's family friendly. FYI, kids eat free on Wednesdays. Kind of crazy, but it was fun.
As you know by now, I'm afraid of my own shadow. We're walking back to my apartment and my mom says, "I'm scared to leave you here."
Me: "Why?!"
Mom: "Because everyone has been getting attacked!"
Me: "Here?!"
Mom: "Well, around town! A girl got beat with a pipe leaving her church's gym!"
Great. Thanks mom. Now I'm going to be petrified to go to sleep and will forever be afraid Lurch is waiting around the corner with a bat or something. This is really no good. Thank God, Tim gave me mase, and thank God he blessed me with strong, beautiful manly neighbors!
Note to self: Take self-defense classes. Seriously. After your mother tells you the chances of you getting attacked could be strong, then you're watching SVU, where there are back to back episodes about sexual predators, it doesn't get much worse. Now she says, "I want you to meet the man of your dreams soon." Okay, Ms. I don't believe in living together before marriage. Now she says, "Maybe he'll be a gay, strong man." WTF?! Are you serious right now? First she's talking about how the psychic says there will be another doctor. Now, she's marrying off to a homosexual.
So, SVU is about rape. Any man who does this deserves to have their wiener chopped off. And I'm not even close to kidding. Who in the hell do these men think they are? Excuse me, coward. I apologize. Maybe not chopped off. Maybe dowsed with gas and lit on fire. It's funny how you never really know a person. The nice man you see in Target, wearing a suit, could be the sick pervert you need to stay away from. Don't be so naive. You never know. And that's one the scariest feelings in the world. At least for me. Don't let fear hold you back, but don't let not having fear get you in trouble.
All I'm saying is, taking self-defense classes would be ease of mind, and potentially helpful.