September 25, 2009
My day of events starts when I hit work. First event: a girl asks if she can photograph me as her model for her art class. Sure! I've always thought of myself as the next Gisele. ;) Her project: an Alice in Wonderland meets wackily-twisted objective art project. She thinks I look like Alice. She has me act "dazed and confused" for a couple headshots. My dad is probably laughing, thinking that's not hard for her to do! Who's going to be laughing when I get a modeling contract?! ;) Hey, a girl can dream!
Next event: a 6-year-old in a stroller, singing Miley Cyrus. Okay, at six...she can walk. Her body is too big for the thing anyway; her limbs are profusely hanging over the edges! Unleash her into the wild of childhood, mom and dad. Who knows, she might survive?!
Next event: A new metaphor! I am talking to O'Anna about time going slow. "Did a hair pass a freckle?" she asks. Excuse me? What? It takes me a minute to get it, but I like it!
Next event: Two Austrailian girls come in and ask where they can find an "I love LA" shirt. Well, I hate to break it to them, but they are in New York. Maybe they pulled a Home Alone and got on the wrong plane, but the only "I 'heart'" tees they will find are ones with a large NY plastered on it! Whoever says there is no such thing as a dumb question, is a liar!
Next event: Good news, ladies and gentlemen, M.J. is NOT dead! That's right, he's busting his dance moves in the middle of our store! He is even wearing the sequenced glove! I can't believe it! However, he is much shorter than I thought. Steven says, "I can't decide if that's a boy or a girl." "Yeah, I know," I say. "Well, at least we know he's a good interpreter if we can't tell what sex he is!" he says back. Hahaha!! God rest Michael's soul!
Next event: I see Jude Law! Oh buddy, what a sexy piece of man he is! He is leaving his Hamlet show off Broadway, so I get a chance to stare a bit, but continue walking--the flashing lights are kind of blinding me. If you think he's cute on TV, you should see him in person! Why can't I find a man like that? =)
Next event: Martinis at a jazz bar with friends--so much fun! The bar is old Hollywood glamour infuses into Manhattan--without the hefty price tag! The 1950s-esque ambiance is coated with dark wood trimmings, deep red leather booths, and a gangster-style, high top bar. We are Sex & the City, minus a Samantha, but plus one fabulous gay man! We order the appetizer sampler, which isn't the typical chicken fingers and potato skins. Instead, it's hummus, mashed eggplant, caviar with mayo, a red bean concoction, a salsa, Turkish cucumber yogurt, and something else--all dips for their delicious homemade bread. Very wierd, but surprisingly tasty!
Next event: Aspen bar across the street to meet other friends. Very trendy--we stay until about 3:45 a.m., then cab it home! My parents are coming tomorrow! Yay! I need all the rest I can get!
Note to self: Think before you speak. Do not ask a mentally handicapped woman if she wants to sign up for a VISA card. That just makes you look like an insensitive human being. Although she looks highly interested in what you're saying, figure out how to segway out of the conversation. Talk about her birthday today--thank goodness she brings it up! Just shake your head at yourself as they leave--who would seriously do that? Apparently, me. Damn.